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Greatest Face Palm Stories of All Time

sterkrazzy

Autocross Champion
I thought those were beetle wheels for a second.

I have a habit of not leaving my car in gear at all. I'm in FL, it's so flat it's not going to roll away if the parking brake fails. Anybody else that ever drives my car, whether it's a mechanic or if my dad had to move it on the driveway, they leave it in gear. I've stalled it a few times because of that, but now I've developed a habit of jiggling the stick before I start it. Even if I'm the last one that was in my car. I can't start it without jiggling the stick anymore.
 

SnailPower

Autocross Newbie
I thought those were beetle wheels for a second.

I have a habit of not leaving my car in gear at all. I'm in FL, it's so flat it's not going to roll away if the parking brake fails. Anybody else that ever drives my car, whether it's a mechanic or if my dad had to move it on the driveway, they leave it in gear. I've stalled it a few times because of that, but now I've developed a habit of jiggling the stick before I start it. Even if I'm the last one that was in my car. I can't start it without jiggling the stick anymore.

I still always park in 1st gear and pull the e-brake up. This car was suuuuuuper quiet stock to the point I stalled out plenty throwing it in first gear and not realizing if the car was still on or not. It was so annoying. I got into the habit of completing reducing radio volume and like freezing myself in place to listen for the engine being on or vibrations of it being on. Waaay too quiet for a "spirited" stock car.

This has since mostly been fixed with my aftermarket exhaust however with OEM dp, it still is pretty damn tame. Not as tame as OEM but still pretty quiet. My reference was my last mk6 GTI with Eurojet catless DP paired to Magnaflow exhaust, lol. I sure as heck knew it was on and so did my neighbors. I'm sure they loved the fact I got rid of that car, lol.
 

SnailPower

Autocross Newbie
To add to this thread. My buddy picked up a new set of tires/rims for his 1999 Jeep Cherokee earlier this week. His driveway is super steep (imagine you're driving up to heaven when you go the driveway) and he lives on a very busy road. He text me earlier that as he accelerated up the driveway, the tires/rims hit the back door of the Jeep and it flew open sending his wheels flying back to the main road. Imagine Jar Jar Binks in the Phantom Menace when he lets loose those blue ball things during the ending battle. He said the 4 wheels went rogue and basically ended up in his neighbor's property across the street. Thankfully no car was passing in the moment the wheels went rolling, otherwise it could be been very bad.

I basically text him 🤦‍♂️ to sum up a paragraph he sent me to describe what happened. Applies to this thread.
 

SnailPower

Autocross Newbie
I thought those were beetle wheels for a second.

I have a habit of not leaving my car in gear at all. I'm in FL, it's so flat it's not going to roll away if the parking brake fails. Anybody else that ever drives my car, whether it's a mechanic or if my dad had to move it on the driveway, they leave it in gear. I've stalled it a few times because of that, but now I've developed a habit of jiggling the stick before I start it. Even if I'm the last one that was in my car. I can't start it without jiggling the stick anymore.

Same dude. It's a habit to give it a jiggle. Enough starting in 1st gear w/o clutch in lunges to give me a heart attack. To just give a jiggle to save that. I'm getting older man, those types of scares are taking years off my life.
 

gixxerfool

Autocross Champion
I thought those were beetle wheels for a second.

I have a habit of not leaving my car in gear at all. I'm in FL, it's so flat it's not going to roll away if the parking brake fails. Anybody else that ever drives my car, whether it's a mechanic or if my dad had to move it on the driveway, they leave it in gear. I've stalled it a few times because of that, but now I've developed a habit of jiggling the stick before I start it. Even if I'm the last one that was in my car. I can't start it without jiggling the stick anymore.
I think that is an older habit that went away and has no come back. My dad taught the basics of driving manual and he told me to always check if it’s in neutral before you start it and put it in any forward gear before reverse. It’s two things I always do even though I have never owned a manual.
 

gixxerfool

Autocross Champion
Most places wouldn't even install a remote start on a manual car, because of this exact scenario.

Also it's his own fault for starting it. Why would he assume a tech would know to leave his car parked in neutral? Most people leave it parked in gear.
Exactly.

that’s what we told him. He said, “WHO LEAVES A MANUAL CAR IN GEAR??” My boss was about 130 years old he turned and looked at him and said, “Everyone?” 🤷🏻‍♂️ That didn’t help the situation.
 

SnailPower

Autocross Newbie
This one not car related.

In my younger years I was out with a buddy at a nearby bar that would get nuts on Tuesday because they allowed girls under 21 to get in but not drink. Had the club vibes but too small and not as cool to be considered a club. They had the girls that would walk around with trays and shots and they were always as hot as can be.

Well I had just gotten a drink from the bar and turn back around to see my buddy standing around. As I approach him, I'm like, gawd damn it smells like someone took a diarrhea sh!t on themselves. My buddy gives me a smile because he laid it. As soon as he does that, one of those shot girls walks right up behind him and hangs her arm around his neck while holding the tray of shots in front of him. His face turned to dread and red as a tomato. The girl's face as she looks at him was almost a grimace but she was holding back saying anything. I walked away from both of them as quickly as I could. All I could think was 🤦‍♂️ We never spoke about that incident ever again and I'm sure he learned his lesson of dropping nasty sh!t in public, lol.
 

The Fed

Old Guys Rule
I'm older than dirt, so I have more than one.

I'm backing out of the garage in my 1978 Trans Am (yes, it had the optional high-performance Pontiac 6.6 T.A. engine). It was an old house, where the garage was built for a Model T. I open the door so I could tell how far I was from the side of the garage door, but I wound up being too close and dinged the edge of the door.

Used to have a 1984 Z-28 H.O. For you youngsters, it was the higher performance version (see a pattern here?). I'm pulling out of my garage and pressed the door button. This was before the electric eye that reversed the door if there's an obstruction. I timed it wrong, and the door came down too soon. I tried to get out of its way and failed. If I just stopped it probably wouldn't have damaged the optional lightweight plastic hood that was part of the H.O. package. Bit I was moving, and it put a bunch of gouges down the hood.

I traded the Z-28 for a FWD 1991 Mazda MX-6 GT Turbo, because I moved and needed to drive in snow to work a lot. So, I'm taking the wife to work. There's a light, that if it's turning red, you can take a street right before the intersection to avoid the light. Shorter, but not as convenient. Took it many times in my Z with no problems. Light turns red, and I instinctively crank the wheel to the right. Well, it wasn't Z, which had (for the time) big wide tires and fast steering. And, of course, RWD. The Mazda understeered badly. I just missed a parked car and hit the curb. It cost me about $1,800 to replace the suspension parts and a wheel and tire. This was the early 1990's, so that probably would have been $5,000 today.

At least I never screwed up my 'Vette. Having one made me slow down
 

JC_451

Autocross Champion
I still always park in 1st gear and pull the e-brake up.
Last winter I forgot to pull the brake up, the car was in gear but I still came out to find that it had rolled almost all the way out of the spot overnight.

I was still really confused in the morning at first. 😂
 

SnailPower

Autocross Newbie
I was driving my first manual car I owned. Was a 2000 Toyota
Last winter I forgot to pull the brake up, the car was in gear but I still came out to find that it had rolled almost all the way out of the spot overnight.

I was still really confused in the morning at first. 😂

Yeah my story with the book story, I probably can't emphasize enough without someone being there to know how far away it actually rolled to share my scare. Like I literally walk out and do some head turns left and right but not ALL the way to the left and I didn't see the car anywhere. I was like, wtf? Where did it go? Then I turn all the way to the left and it's like a good 75 feet away, lol. "Oh there you are! I thought you were leaving me".
 

torga

Autocross Champion
He had it towed out. Wanted us to cover the repair. Erm, no.
that’s what we told him. He said, “WHO LEAVES A MANUAL CAR IN GEAR??” My boss was about 130 years old he turned and looked at him and said, “Everyone?” 🤷🏻‍♂️ That didn’t help the situation.

I love hearing stories about absolute idiots trying to blame a shop or a company for something that's entirely their fault, and the company just casually saying "ehhhh go fuck yerself paisano". This schadenfreude is good shit.
 

torga

Autocross Champion
This one not car related.

In my younger years I was out with a buddy at a nearby bar that would get nuts on Tuesday because they allowed girls under 21 to get in but not drink. Had the club vibes but too small and not as cool to be considered a club. They had the girls that would walk around with trays and shots and they were always as hot as can be.

Well I had just gotten a drink from the bar and turn back around to see my buddy standing around. As I approach him, I'm like, gawd damn it smells like someone took a diarrhea sh!t on themselves. My buddy gives me a smile because he laid it. As soon as he does that, one of those shot girls walks right up behind him and hangs her arm around his neck while holding the tray of shots in front of him. His face turned to dread and red as a tomato. The girl's face as she looks at him was almost a grimace but she was holding back saying anything. I walked away from both of them as quickly as I could. All I could think was 🤦‍♂️ We never spoke about that incident ever again and I'm sure he learned his lesson of dropping nasty sh!t in public, lol.

I'll never learn my lesson about crop dusting large crowds. It's the perfect crime, so long as you keep moving.
 

tdream1

Autocross Newbie
I'm older than dirt, so I have more than one.

I'm backing out of the garage in my 1978 Trans Am (yes, it had the optional high-performance Pontiac 6.6 T.A. engine). It was an old house, where the garage was built for a Model T. I open the door so I could tell how far I was from the side of the garage door, but I wound up being too close and dinged the edge of the door.

Used to have a 1984 Z-28 H.O. For you youngsters, it was the higher performance version (see a pattern here?). I'm pulling out of my garage and pressed the door button. This was before the electric eye that reversed the door if there's an obstruction. I timed it wrong, and the door came down too soon. I tried to get out of its way and failed. If I just stopped it probably wouldn't have damaged the optional lightweight plastic hood that was part of the H.O. package. Bit I was moving, and it put a bunch of gouges down the hood.

I traded the Z-28 for a FWD 1991 Mazda MX-6 GT Turbo, because I moved and needed to drive in snow to work a lot. So, I'm taking the wife to work. There's a light, that if it's turning red, you can take a street right before the intersection to avoid the light. Shorter, but not as convenient. Took it many times in my Z with no problems. Light turns red, and I instinctively crank the wheel to the right. Well, it wasn't Z, which had (for the time) big wide tires and fast steering. And, of course, RWD. The Mazda understeered badly. I just missed a parked car and hit the curb. It cost me about $1,800 to replace the suspension parts and a wheel and tire. This was the early 1990's, so that probably would have been $5,000 today.

At least I never screwed up my 'Vette. Having one made me slow down
I had an '84 Z-28 H.O. as well between the ages of 17 and 22. My buddy and I had the 'brilliant' idea to hook up a manual choke cable to the secondaries of the 4 barrel carb. We mounted the choke pull right under the e-brake handle. This enabled me to open all 4 barrels up at the same time. It surprised a few IROC-Zs back then. It was fun while it lasted and then that 'brilliant' modification blew cylinder #2 and the car would smoke like a mother-f'er at stop lights. One time, a couple next to me in the other lane beeped and said, 'I think your car is on fire'. I smoked up 4 lanes worth of road. I would have to carry spare quarts of oil and keep dumping it in because it was burning through it like crazy. The engine seized shortly thereafter. It was $900 back then to replace it. Lesson learned.
 
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